[The gentle affection to his hand gets a loving smile. Maybe it's silly, but he can't get enough of this kind of tender touch. The press of the lips leaves his skin pleasantly tingling.]
So then you could sleep on me all the time.
[His voice is as playful, but he thinks the idea is nice. His feathers are very soft, it would be a waste not to use them somehow.]
[It's a rare thing for Vanitas to be so sweetly affectionate, but the closer he gets to perishing, the more he wants to show those close to him how much he appreciates them.]
That's the idea. I wouldn't need to disturb you to feel like you're always here with me.
[Something that he'll love even more when sick and dying, he knows. Or even just if Aether is busy.]
Maybe I'm used to having someone by my side. [He says with a smile.] My sister was always with me and... later Paimon would always accompany me everywhere.
[Completely the opposite from him, who has been forever alone since early days. Hence why he gets so overwhelmed sometimes now, with so many people and so much love. It gets to be too much.]
I'm glad you didn't have to handle everything by yourself, at least. You don't deserve that hardship.
I can handle a lot on my own, you know? It's perfectly fine.
[Despite the company of friends and other people, Aether tends to take everything on himself. It's this persistent belief that he's fine, that he can push away any negative thoughts and no matter the hardships, he will prevail.
But it does make him feel lonely, even when amongst the people he cares about so dearly.
The recent events with Vanitas and Vincent showed him, though, that it's fine if he's lost and seeks help, even if it's a difficult thing to do for him.]
[He notes the change curiously, wondering if something he said had inadvertently hurt Aether.]
I know. You're amazing in that regard. But that doesn't mean I want you to endure difficult times alone.
[There's no reason for him to burden himself with everyone's problems while ignoring his own needs and desires. It doesn't matter if they're small or trivial, he should have someone by his side to provide encouragement and support. It's something Vanitas tries to do, too, but he knows he's rather shit at it.
Sighing quietly, he strokes Aether's hair.]
I apologize if it seemed like I was patronizing you.
[Curious, he peers at Aether. It's true the other doesn't frequently come to them with concerns, although perhaps that's because Vanitas has been oblivious to how much his lover might be struggling.]
You don't have to force yourself if you're not comfortable doing so. There's always time for you to speak your mind when you're ready.
[Meaning that he'll be waiting for the day when Aether confides in him about those deeper, darker troubles. For now, however, he simply pets the other's hair, toying lightly with his braid.]
Yeah. It's alright to go slowly. [Even if he know that to Aether, time marches on very differently from those like himself, who have maybe only a few years left in them.
But that's for another time. Right now, he's trying to convey that Aether shouldn't feel obligated to do what others want him to do.]
That would be a good idea, heh... You take on so much, try to save everyone... But who will save you if you don't let them in? [He doesn't want Aether to either burn out or fall from the sky.]
I know you and Vince, and all my friends would do whatever it takes to save me.
[He knows, he really does... So why there's still some doubt in his heart sometimes? That they don't care enough to truly understand what he needs and wants? Maybe he's just selfish, wishing for someone to read his mind when in reality it's not even needed, because he's the one who doesn't allow others to truly know him.
We would. You're precious to us. All of them, I'm sure.
[Since he can't speak for each of Aether's friends, only the few he knows. Like Xiao. He knows that man would go to the ends of the earth for Aether, and then some, just as he and Vince would. Though there still seems to be a bit of sadness in his lover, which worries Vanitas. He doesn't quite understand where it's stemming from, and thus has no idea how to help. He doesn't like feeling powerless like this. It reminds him too much of his time years ago when he had no control over his life, when Moreau dictated everything.
[The question makes him pause for much longer than it should. Aether looks away for a moment, like he doesn't want to see disappointment in Vanitas' eyes.]
I'm... trying to be more open about it. [He frowns to himself.] It's... not that easy.
[It's during that lull that Vanitas' expression falls slightly. Yet he can understand what it's like, to not be able to ask for something as simple as the consideration that one needs. So he merely laughs quietly, even if it's a touch bitter.]
...no, no it's not. But then, what in life that's worthwhile is?
[After all, he's hardly the pinnacle of forthrightness, himself.]
[Aether can't really argue with it. After a moment of contemplation, he wraps his arms around Vanitas securely and rolls them around, making his lover end up on top of him instead. Aether's white wings wrap around him to keep him warm and cozy.]
I would've thought somebody your age would know better by now.
[Teasing him? You betcha! Though Vanitas get a well deserved flip of positions, eliciting a faint oof as he settles with a smile, gazing down at Aether with bright blue eyes. That he has a wing cloak to keep him warm only serves to make him happier, tail swaying softly.]
[For all his teasing, being suddenly called anyone's my leaves him momentarily stunned, until heat rises to his cheeks and he has to huff in order to keep breathing.]
Yours, huh.....
[Somehow that seems to make things even more serious than before, setting him on edge despite being giddy with affection.]
Y-Yeah. I am who I am, after all... [Meaning he can't help being reserved in that regard.]
[Meaning the whole idea of being anybody's something is fluster-worthy. Still, he starts to unwind with the soothing pets, until finally, he ducks his head and hides his face against Aether's neck. Eventually, there comes a faint mumble.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
no subject
Chuckling a bit, Vanitas takes hold of Aether's hand and guides it to his lips, brushing over it softly.]
I won't say no. I've been meaning to make them into pillows. Heh.
[Is he teasing or serious... He certainly seems to be completely committed to the idea.]
no subject
So then you could sleep on me all the time.
[His voice is as playful, but he thinks the idea is nice. His feathers are very soft, it would be a waste not to use them somehow.]
no subject
That's the idea. I wouldn't need to disturb you to feel like you're always here with me.
[Something that he'll love even more when sick and dying, he knows. Or even just if Aether is busy.]
no subject
[There's another kiss planted on Vanitas' skin, right to his cheek, then again to his neck.]
But I like the idea of always being by your side in some way.
[As long as it brings his lover comfort, especially in these difficult times. Aether can't forget about the spectral death looming over his partner.]
no subject
[At least, he thinks everyone must feel like that now and then. Though the kisses make it difficult to think that way right now.]
Mmm... You've always been a comfort to me, ever since the beginning.
[It's one reason he treasures Aether so much. He's always made sure to never let him feel like he's going through things alone.]
no subject
That's true, but...
[He doesn't like being alone.]
Maybe I'm used to having someone by my side. [He says with a smile.] My sister was always with me and... later Paimon would always accompany me everywhere.
no subject
[Completely the opposite from him, who has been forever alone since early days. Hence why he gets so overwhelmed sometimes now, with so many people and so much love. It gets to be too much.]
I'm glad you didn't have to handle everything by yourself, at least. You don't deserve that hardship.
no subject
I can handle a lot on my own, you know? It's perfectly fine.
[Despite the company of friends and other people, Aether tends to take everything on himself. It's this persistent belief that he's fine, that he can push away any negative thoughts and no matter the hardships, he will prevail.
But it does make him feel lonely, even when amongst the people he cares about so dearly.
The recent events with Vanitas and Vincent showed him, though, that it's fine if he's lost and seeks help, even if it's a difficult thing to do for him.]
no subject
I know. You're amazing in that regard. But that doesn't mean I want you to endure difficult times alone.
[There's no reason for him to burden himself with everyone's problems while ignoring his own needs and desires. It doesn't matter if they're small or trivial, he should have someone by his side to provide encouragement and support. It's something Vanitas tries to do, too, but he knows he's rather shit at it.
Sighing quietly, he strokes Aether's hair.]
I apologize if it seemed like I was patronizing you.
no subject
No... No, it's not that.
[He rests his head against his lover's shoulder, letting him stroke his hair as much as he wishes.]
I... realized I'm not really good at opening up about my own worries.
no subject
You don't have to force yourself if you're not comfortable doing so. There's always time for you to speak your mind when you're ready.
[Meaning that he'll be waiting for the day when Aether confides in him about those deeper, darker troubles. For now, however, he simply pets the other's hair, toying lightly with his braid.]
no subject
When I'm ready... [It may take a long time before that happens and Aether doesn't exactly want to think about it.
He closes his eyes, enjoying the way Vanitas plays with his hair.]
Maybe I need to stop thinking I can handle everything by myself. [It's a soft murmur more than anything else.]
no subject
But that's for another time. Right now, he's trying to convey that Aether shouldn't feel obligated to do what others want him to do.]
That would be a good idea, heh... You take on so much, try to save everyone... But who will save you if you don't let them in? [He doesn't want Aether to either burn out or fall from the sky.]
no subject
I know you and Vince, and all my friends would do whatever it takes to save me.
[He knows, he really does... So why there's still some doubt in his heart sometimes? That they don't care enough to truly understand what he needs and wants? Maybe he's just selfish, wishing for someone to read his mind when in reality it's not even needed, because he's the one who doesn't allow others to truly know him.
He needs to open his heart.]
no subject
We would. You're precious to us. All of them, I'm sure.
[Since he can't speak for each of Aether's friends, only the few he knows. Like Xiao. He knows that man would go to the ends of the earth for Aether, and then some, just as he and Vince would. Though there still seems to be a bit of sadness in his lover, which worries Vanitas. He doesn't quite understand where it's stemming from, and thus has no idea how to help. He doesn't like feeling powerless like this. It reminds him too much of his time years ago when he had no control over his life, when Moreau dictated everything.
So instead, he tries reaching out.]
...you'd say so if you needed something, right?
no subject
I'm... trying to be more open about it. [He frowns to himself.] It's... not that easy.
[He's so used to keeping to himself.]
no subject
...no, no it's not. But then, what in life that's worthwhile is?
[After all, he's hardly the pinnacle of forthrightness, himself.]
no subject
[Aether can't really argue with it. After a moment of contemplation, he wraps his arms around Vanitas securely and rolls them around, making his lover end up on top of him instead. Aether's white wings wrap around him to keep him warm and cozy.]
But for you... I will try.
no subject
[Teasing him? You betcha! Though Vanitas get a well deserved flip of positions, eliciting a faint oof as he settles with a smile, gazing down at Aether with bright blue eyes. That he has a wing cloak to keep him warm only serves to make him happier, tail swaying softly.]
Atta boy. [So cheeky today...!]
no subject
[He huffs a little at it, but quickly laughs afterwards.]
Not even a "Thank you"? You really don't respect your elders, huh.
[So very cheeky indeed!]
no subject
[That's enough to make him grin widely as he leans down to hug Aether.]
I don't do thanks, you should know that. Nothing personal.
[Generally speaking, anyways. It's one of those hangups he has.]
no subject
[Those words are spoken with sincerity.]
To me you'll always be my Vanitas. [He chuckles softly, hugging back and closing his eyes.]
Right, I need to remember about it.
no subject
Yours, huh.....
[Somehow that seems to make things even more serious than before, setting him on edge despite being giddy with affection.]
Y-Yeah. I am who I am, after all... [Meaning he can't help being reserved in that regard.]
no subject
Well, mine and Vince's. [He chuckles.] We all belong to each other.
no subject
[Meaning the whole idea of being anybody's something is fluster-worthy. Still, he starts to unwind with the soothing pets, until finally, he ducks his head and hides his face against Aether's neck. Eventually, there comes a faint mumble.]
Thanks...