[Hell, he dug low to place the bar, honestly. But now it's being raised, inch by inch, to a more acceptable level.
At her refusal to admit as much, his brows raise, eyes widening slightly. He would've thought she'd take any opportunity to say those three little words, given how affectionate she's being. Does she not want to...? Is that not what she feels...? It's baffling to say the least.
But at the same time, he doesn't want to pressure her into saying something she might regret, so instead he merely hums softly, eyes drifting downwards as he leans in a little more.]
Alright then... If you say so. [So he'll just focus on kissing her sweetly for the time being. Maybe that will get her to feel comfortable enough to be honest with not only him, but herself as well.]
[ normally, yes. she'd say those three little words without any hesitation. it's obvious to the deaf and the blind that jeanne is madly in love with him.
it's something else entirely. that something else being her fear he'll pull away from her once he figures out the truth. just like she was told. dominique warned her if vanitas ever found out about her feelings, it wouldn't end well. a man like that is twisted and hopeless.
the only way she'd regret saying she loved him is if vanitas hated her for it.
since her eyes are closed, the only way she realizes he's getting closer is the louder beat of his pulse. the proximity of his hum and the warmth of his breath on her lips, moments before he kisses her.
... or she would regret not telling him at all. he's so understanding, so gentle, and it drives her crazy. it'd be easier not to tell him if he was demanding and rough, but he hasn't been in a long time. like he is making up for their first meeting. ]
I-I do. I-I say so. Nothing else. [ said against his mouth. between each kiss. every word revealing that her resolve is falling apart, piece by piece. ] Just that... I adore you, so much...
[Truthfully, it's not an unfounded fear for her to have. He's done it before, fretting and panicking and becoming ill for ten days when she so much as expressed her affection for him.
Though he could never hate her, especially not for loving him. Although he could very easily become terrified to the point of fleeing. THAT is a very real possibility for one as messed up as him. But hate? No, never. He does love her, after all, in his own weird, admittedly twisted way.
Once their lips touch, he sighs in relief almost, capturing her in a firm but still soft kiss. It's slow and sweet and nothing at all like his first forced kiss. Everything about it is different, except perhaps the taste of him.
For he is trying to make up for past mistakes, for being callous and rude and a brute. The monster that he knows he is. Or thinks he is.]
Mmm... M'kay. I trust you and your judgement. [He breathes against her lips, stealing a tender kiss now and then, all the while knowing she's likely struggling against his ministrations.] I adore you too, you know...
[ nothing at all like the kiss he forced on her. except the one (two) thing consistent is the passion from vanitas. more... composed? but there. hers is being kept behind a dam, stemming the flood that wants to burst forth and drag them downstream.
(and the taste, too. both his and hers. that's the same.)
jeanne, ultimately, can't stop her knees from getting weak. as if they haven't had sex and done so much more than kiss a bit. this hardly qualifies under making out. even how he talks into it makes it better. the meaning of those words? not so much.
indeed, she is struggling. visibly. quivering and tense like a spring. clenching her fists on his chest. chasing his mouth when he pulls away so she's closer. chest flush to his. ]
[And honestly, he wants to drown in her stream of affection and love. It would be a good way to go, being blessed with her own passion. But this is good, too, especially since she tastes just as sweet as always.
Thankfully he's here to help hold her up, arms wrapping around her to keep her close as they lean against the cracked wall. Tht's a problem for later, after all. Right now, all that exists in this world is the two of them. Everything else is trivial and far away.
The way she chases after him earns a knowing smile, slightly teasing but still full of love. Bumping noses, he kisses her again and again, soft and sweet little pecks that probably don't satisfy, but share his feelings all the same.]
Hmmmm...? [He hums encouragingly, bumping foreheads with her as he gazes into her eyes.]
[ it's true. she's completely forgotten about the wall since vanitas has kissed her. everything but how his mouth feels against hers. or the rhythm of his breathing. the warmth and safety of his arms around her waist. the shape the curve his mouth makes when he s-smiles against her lips.
(that drives her a little mad)
they don't. they don't satisfy her completely. they keep her on the edge, they keep her leaning into him, they keep her pursuing his mouth and his smile as her hands bundle up into tight fists on his chest and her breathing grows more harsh.
louder over the sound of their lips making soft smacks. from vanitas connecting and disconnecting her to him, over and over, so a tiny whine catches in her throat. ]
Reallyreallyreally... really, r-really l- [ almost slipped up. it's those blue eyes breaking her thoughts or the nudge of his forehead. or just vanitas, as he is, warm and so loving in his entirety. ] A-adore. Adore you.
[No surprise that the poor wall has been forgotten by a pair of lovers so keen on each other. So fixated on one another's bodily responses and kisses and everything, really.
He finds her reactions so deliciously tantalizing, from the way she fists her hands upon him to the chase of his lips for more kisses. She's just as desperate as him, if not more so, actually. It's terribly sweet, heh.
Once her whine pierces the air, he shivers with delight, hugging her that much more to himself as he moves down to kiss her neck.]
Mmhmm... You can say it, you know... [Even if it might make his skin crawl with fear, if she wants to say it, he won't stop her. He longs for her happiness, after all. Moving back up to her lips, they bump foreheads again.] I adore you, too...
[ wall-chan, she will fix you later. vanitas is taking all of her attention. demanding it, actually, every time he pulls away from her and his lips twitch with a smile he probably thinks he's hiding.
or doesn't care that he's not hiding it at all.
jeanne can't hide a damn thing. not her love for him and not how her legs grow weak as he trails his kissing down to her throat. it moves with the thickness of her swallow. working down nerves.
can she say it? n-no, she's not supposed to. she can't, if it'll scare him. she can't lose him. with her stress, her breathing isn't just rushed from him kissing her. it's from her own fear. a fusion of anxiety and arousal and her love settling in her stomach.
clenching her eyes shut, she shakes her head back and forth and holds him tighter. ]
[Just another reason Orlok isn't going to be happy with him, even if it was Jeanne's strength that did it. He certainly believes he's being stoic, though it's completely blatant that he's smiling happily.
He feels her tremble, starting from the legs and working their way up until she's like a leaf fluttering in his arms. Yet he holds onto her tight, unwilling to let her go and be free to float away.
She's his, after all. His first love, his current lover, and hopefully to be his last. He doesn't think there's anything that could deter him anymore, not even the dreaded L-word from her. Because... he adores her. Treasures her like no other. She is special in every way. From her fierceness when fighting him to her soft, shy affections, he loves every aspect of her.
And so he kisses her again and again, on the neck, the jaw, cheek and chin. And finally the lips, capturing them and preventing any words from immediately coming out. Until they both need breath.]
...nothing. It's fine. [He won't push anymore. He'll let her keep her peace.]
[ as if she would float away when she could be in his arms like this. when he's kissing her over and over, all over, like he loves her. every spot he leaves warm and cherished and her, desperate for him to kiss her more. normally, she would just grab him by the face and do it herself but-
but she did all that the other night. their first time together. maybe vanitas wants something else, so she lets him decide their pacing despite her body vibrating with the need to do it all herself. having him inundate her with his affections, how he wants to express them, is better than anything she could do.
and that final kiss? worth waiting for. she melts against him a little more, sagging against his body with a breathy sigh. before she knows it, ]
[If she floats away, he only hopes to go with her, heh. Though if it's merely the sensation she gets, that's fine. He can handle that, because he, too, feels blissfully lightheaded and pleasant. So he kisses her over and over again, until capturing her lips for a solid and thorough smooch.
Yet her apology comes as a surprise, leaving him looking bewildered and confused. She has nothing to apologize for in his eyes. If anything, she's being smart by not saying that accursed word which so frequently puts him off and scares him. So he takes her face in his hands, cradling her cheeks as he presses against her, pinning her in place.]
[ jeanne's first instinct is to fight him off and pin him down. instead, she doesn't. all this practice with her self-control today, with not throwing him down on the bed and climbing on top of him has prepared her to stay still and, if anything, somewhat enjoy being on the other side.
she always thought she needed to be in charge. to do everything. to take care of vanitas. to stay alert. ]
I want to say it, but I... I can't. Lady Dominique told me you hated it. And, that one time, on our date... your face...
[Ironic then that he would be perfectly happy having her pin him down and have her way with him, honestly. But then, he's content just being together with her, with sharing kisses and body warmth by nuzzling up against one another. It's... nice, really.
But he also likes being able to do things for her, even if it's just guide her through the motions for their makeout sessions. It makes him feel in control and not like some helpless child.
At her words, though, he rests a hand upon her cheeks, lifting her face to meet his so they can kiss softly.]
...I know. It frightened me. I'll admit that much. But... I wouldn't hate you for saying it. Never. I just... might not be able to believe it.
[ any time with vanitas is happy time in her mind, too. being able to show him affection, how much she loves him in the only way she knows how. physically. sometimes, with stuttered and expressed feelings. by protecting him and never thinking badly of him.
this is much softer between them. this is like their moment in the cabin where they shared body heat.
every kiss chases away her uncertainties, bit by bit. so that those three words sit, waiting (im)patiently to be used. ]
But I would mean it! I really would, this time!! Unlike our date...!
[ grabbing his hands on her face and leaning in close to EMPHASIZE HER POINT. ]
[It's too much oftentimes, more than a wretched being like him deserves. That's the main thing that goes through his mind when they're together: that someone like him doesn't deserve a wonderful woman like Jeanne. Not her kindness, nor her compassion, and certainly not her love.
Even if he eats up every kiss and bite and the warmth of her body pressed against his.
He trembles at little at her admitting as much, that she would mean those three little magic, frightening words. His grip on her tightens, and he leans in to rest their foreheads together.]
...did you enjoy it?
[He asks softly, carefully. Curiosity burning within him.]
[ but see? jeanne believes she's the irredeemable one! not him. he's saving vampires! she... murdered them. by the thousands. chloé was able to be saved because of him. she would have killed her if vanitas wasn't there. because, in her mind, there was no other option.
but jeanne is selfish. she doesn't think she doesn't deserve him, she's simply happy to be able to stay in his orbit. that he's not running away from her when he probably should be. with how much she wants his blood.
at first, she only blinks at him as her face colors with a blush. ]
Yes. I did. D-despite my goals, I did. Very much. You took me to so many places I've never seen. Bought me whatever food I wanted... and I saw a side of you I wasn't mentally prepared for.
Then you... what you said to me in the atelier. About killing me. I think it started there. It was so, so incredibly compassionate. Like you understood how I felt completely.
[They're both a couple of dumb dummies, honestly. She did what she had to do to keep herself safe, after all. She had no choice in the matter. He did. Yes, he chose to help them for his revenge, but still. He's killed before, even if it was out of mercy. They're not so different, in his eyes at least. More importantly... they work well together. Able to help even more vampires.
He watches her color, feeling his own face warm slightly. He's selfish, too. He wants to keep her for himself. Doesn't want to share her with Luca or anyone else. Wants her to be his and his alone. Especially when she speaks and her words reach him, making him flush that much deeper.]
T-That was all to trick you, you know... [It's muttered off to one side, but the rest of what she says strikes a chord within him, and he brushes their noses together.] I do... I do understand. More than you realize, I think. We're not so different, you and I...
[ to trick her? to do what? to drink his blood? she doesn't get it. she would've done that anyway.
and does it matter? she's happy and she hopes that vanitas is, too. she's so happy to be in love. to have these beautiful, warm feelings for another person. that simply rubbing their noses together puts her on cloud nine. back into babel.
a small, gentle smile tugs at her lips and she exhales a slow breath but it slowly fades as his words sink in. vanitas would want to die too if he ever became less of himself. ]
Is it... what you hide beneath your glove? You didn't want me to take it off.
[Trying to fool her into hating him, actually, but yeah. Backfired spectacularly, didn't it?
But... in the end it worked out. They grew closer, and he started falling for her for real, too. Now they're both hopeless idiots in love. He doesn't know how to handle it, honestly - he's doing a pretty miserable job in his own eyes - but... he doesn't hate it anymore. It's... nice, actually, feeling loved and loving someone in return.
At her question, he looks away, suddenly becoming distant. He can't help clutching at his arm, flinching a bit as it seems to throb almost. But finally he nods slightly.]
...it'll take over me one day. I won't be myself anymore. I want someone to kill me before that happens.
[ backfired into a explosion in the other direction.
and now? that's what he meant by understanding more than she realized. while he's looking away, clutching at his arm, spiralling into what his grim future holds, she wraps her arms tight around him. holding him like he did with her while she cried fearful and miserable tears on his chest.
she would offer to kill him but, unlike him, she's not sure if she could do it. she couldn't do it with chloé. instead, she makes a promise to herself.
for as long as he's alive, she'll love him with her whole being. she'll make sure that he'll never feel alone.
a darker thought passes through her mind, too. she hopes he kills her before she has to watch vanitas die. ]
He jolts at the feel of her arms around him, almost wanting to fight her off, but then the warmth of her her embrace comes through, and he realizes just how good it feels to be held in such a way again. Like he hasn't since he killed Luna. It leaves him trembling both from nerves and enjoyment.
He doesn't expect her to fulfill that request for him, doesn't want to place that burden on her. Not when she's already had to carry the weight of so many lives with her.
He would just be happy to see her smiling face before he dies, honestly. That would help bring him some measure of peace.]
[ jeanne mutters his name into his shoulder and closes her eyes. it would be hard but, yes, she could entrust that heavy burden with him. just as she confided vanitas' safety while she saved lady dominique.
what worries her is if noé has killed anybody at all. he would be weighted with the guilt of killing someone he treausured. like she did for chloé for so long.
if she's unfortunate enough (and she just might be) to be around when vanitas dies, then... she holds him to her closer, burying how close she is to tears into his neck. ]
[It's a concern they both have, not only for Noé, but for Vanitas himself. If Noé can't manage it, then it might fall to Jeanne, and she may be unable to bring herself to do the job of ending his life. What then? Will he become a mindless monster? Or a malnomen himself like Queen Faustina?
It's a fate he doesn't want to think about, becoming something that would hurt others to such a degree. He has to believe that between his two dear friends, they could get the job done.
He sighs in relief at her words, hugging her back and nuzzling against the crook of her neck.]
...thank you.
honestly should've saved this convo for game but HHH THEy
[ if it ends up being her, she will just have to tell herself (over and over and over and over) it's what vanitas wants. even if it's not what she wants. unlike with chloé, she won't hesitate. she won't make the same mistakes. she won't let vanitas become the monster.
just as he wouldn't allow it of her.
it's his gratitude that makes the tears spill over and her bottom lip to quiver. for her to hold him to near painful levels, sorry. squeeeeeeeze.
she lets go soon enough, reaching up to wipe at her face. what depressing talk when they were on the course to have sex. ]
... Huh? Where is Noé? [ ... ] I-I-I didn't even check to make sure he wasn't in the room before I - I - ! AUGH.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
WEEPS
At her refusal to admit as much, his brows raise, eyes widening slightly. He would've thought she'd take any opportunity to say those three little words, given how affectionate she's being. Does she not want to...? Is that not what she feels...? It's baffling to say the least.
But at the same time, he doesn't want to pressure her into saying something she might regret, so instead he merely hums softly, eyes drifting downwards as he leans in a little more.]
Alright then... If you say so. [So he'll just focus on kissing her sweetly for the time being. Maybe that will get her to feel comfortable enough to be honest with not only him, but herself as well.]
it's been waiting.... IN THE CORNERs
it's something else entirely. that something else being her fear he'll pull away from her once he figures out the truth. just like she was told. dominique warned her if vanitas ever found out about her feelings, it wouldn't end well. a man like that is twisted and hopeless.
the only way she'd regret saying she loved him is if vanitas hated her for it.
since her eyes are closed, the only way she realizes he's getting closer is the louder beat of his pulse. the proximity of his hum and the warmth of his breath on her lips, moments before he kisses her.
... or she would regret not telling him at all. he's so understanding, so gentle, and it drives her crazy. it'd be easier not to tell him if he was demanding and rough, but he hasn't been in a long time. like he is making up for their first meeting. ]
I-I do. I-I say so. Nothing else. [ said against his mouth. between each kiss. every word revealing that her resolve is falling apart, piece by piece. ] Just that... I adore you, so much...
LURKING IN THE SHADOWS
Though he could never hate her, especially not for loving him. Although he could very easily become terrified to the point of fleeing. THAT is a very real possibility for one as messed up as him. But hate? No, never. He does love her, after all, in his own weird, admittedly twisted way.
Once their lips touch, he sighs in relief almost, capturing her in a firm but still soft kiss. It's slow and sweet and nothing at all like his first forced kiss. Everything about it is different, except perhaps the taste of him.
For he is trying to make up for past mistakes, for being callous and rude and a brute. The monster that he knows he is. Or thinks he is.]
Mmm... M'kay. I trust you and your judgement. [He breathes against her lips, stealing a tender kiss now and then, all the while knowing she's likely struggling against his ministrations.] I adore you too, you know...
"PSPSPSPSPS LOOK OVER HERE"
(and the taste, too. both his and hers. that's the same.)
jeanne, ultimately, can't stop her knees from getting weak. as if they haven't had sex and done so much more than kiss a bit. this hardly qualifies under making out. even how he talks into it makes it better. the meaning of those words? not so much.
indeed, she is struggling. visibly. quivering and tense like a spring. clenching her fists on his chest. chasing his mouth when he pulls away so she's closer. chest flush to his. ]
I really, really, really, reallyreallyreally -
https://bleude.dreamwidth.org/file/36557.png LOL
Thankfully he's here to help hold her up, arms wrapping around her to keep her close as they lean against the cracked wall. Tht's a problem for later, after all. Right now, all that exists in this world is the two of them. Everything else is trivial and far away.
The way she chases after him earns a knowing smile, slightly teasing but still full of love. Bumping noses, he kisses her again and again, soft and sweet little pecks that probably don't satisfy, but share his feelings all the same.]
Hmmmm...? [He hums encouragingly, bumping foreheads with her as he gazes into her eyes.]
LMFAo THE DIFFERENCE WITH THE ICON
(that drives her a little mad)
they don't. they don't satisfy her completely. they keep her on the edge, they keep her leaning into him, they keep her pursuing his mouth and his smile as her hands bundle up into tight fists on his chest and her breathing grows more harsh.
louder over the sound of their lips making soft smacks. from vanitas connecting and disconnecting her to him, over and over, so a tiny whine catches in her throat. ]
Reallyreallyreally... really, r-really l- [ almost slipped up. it's those blue eyes breaking her thoughts or the nudge of his forehead. or just vanitas, as he is, warm and so loving in his entirety. ] A-adore. Adore you.
crazy ain't it hahaha
He finds her reactions so deliciously tantalizing, from the way she fists her hands upon him to the chase of his lips for more kisses. She's just as desperate as him, if not more so, actually. It's terribly sweet, heh.
Once her whine pierces the air, he shivers with delight, hugging her that much more to himself as he moves down to kiss her neck.]
Mmhmm... You can say it, you know... [Even if it might make his skin crawl with fear, if she wants to say it, he won't stop her. He longs for her happiness, after all. Moving back up to her lips, they bump foreheads again.] I adore you, too...
what's crazy is i got BASKETBALL CAPTCHA
or doesn't care that he's not hiding it at all.
jeanne can't hide a damn thing. not her love for him and not how her legs grow weak as he trails his kissing down to her throat. it moves with the thickness of her swallow. working down nerves.
can she say it? n-no, she's not supposed to. she can't, if it'll scare him. she can't lose him. with her stress, her breathing isn't just rushed from him kissing her. it's from her own fear. a fusion of anxiety and arousal and her love settling in her stomach.
clenching her eyes shut, she shakes her head back and forth and holds him tighter. ]
S-say wh-what? I, I don't know what you mean.
LMAOOO that's just silly
He feels her tremble, starting from the legs and working their way up until she's like a leaf fluttering in his arms. Yet he holds onto her tight, unwilling to let her go and be free to float away.
She's his, after all. His first love, his current lover, and hopefully to be his last. He doesn't think there's anything that could deter him anymore, not even the dreaded L-word from her. Because... he adores her. Treasures her like no other. She is special in every way. From her fierceness when fighting him to her soft, shy affections, he loves every aspect of her.
And so he kisses her again and again, on the neck, the jaw, cheek and chin. And finally the lips, capturing them and preventing any words from immediately coming out. Until they both need breath.]
...nothing. It's fine. [He won't push anymore. He'll let her keep her peace.]
WHAT ARE THESE NEW CAPTCHAS!!! I'M OLD
but she did all that the other night. their first time together. maybe vanitas wants something else, so she lets him decide their pacing despite her body vibrating with the need to do it all herself. having him inundate her with his affections, how he wants to express them, is better than anything she could do.
and that final kiss? worth waiting for. she melts against him a little more, sagging against his body with a breathy sigh. before she knows it, ]
I'm sorry -
HAHA... VINTAGE CAPTCHAS PLZ.......
Yet her apology comes as a surprise, leaving him looking bewildered and confused. She has nothing to apologize for in his eyes. If anything, she's being smart by not saying that accursed word which so frequently puts him off and scares him. So he takes her face in his hands, cradling her cheeks as he presses against her, pinning her in place.]
What for?
I MISS THE MATH
she always thought she needed to be in charge. to do everything. to take care of vanitas. to stay alert. ]
I want to say it, but I... I can't. Lady Dominique told me you hated it. And, that one time, on our date... your face...
NO MATH 4 U
But he also likes being able to do things for her, even if it's just guide her through the motions for their makeout sessions. It makes him feel in control and not like some helpless child.
At her words, though, he rests a hand upon her cheeks, lifting her face to meet his so they can kiss softly.]
...I know. It frightened me. I'll admit that much. But... I wouldn't hate you for saying it. Never. I just... might not be able to believe it.
BWEASE
this is much softer between them. this is like their moment in the cabin where they shared body heat.
every kiss chases away her uncertainties, bit by bit. so that those three words sit, waiting (im)patiently to be used. ]
But I would mean it! I really would, this time!! Unlike our date...!
[ grabbing his hands on her face and leaning in close to EMPHASIZE HER POINT. ]
But, even then... that date was...
WATCH THEM GIVE ME THE MATH ONES SOB
Even if he eats up every kiss and bite and the warmth of her body pressed against his.
He trembles at little at her admitting as much, that she would mean those three little magic, frightening words. His grip on her tightens, and he leans in to rest their foreheads together.]
...did you enjoy it?
[He asks softly, carefully. Curiosity burning within him.]
NOOOOOOOOOOO MEEeee
but jeanne is selfish. she doesn't think she doesn't deserve him, she's simply happy to be able to stay in his orbit. that he's not running away from her when he probably should be. with how much she wants his blood.
at first, she only blinks at him as her face colors with a blush. ]
Yes. I did. D-despite my goals, I did. Very much. You took me to so many places I've never seen. Bought me whatever food I wanted... and I saw a side of you I wasn't mentally prepared for.
Then you... what you said to me in the atelier. About killing me. I think it started there. It was so, so incredibly compassionate. Like you understood how I felt completely.
YOU CAN HAVE THEM I DON'T WANT EM
He watches her color, feeling his own face warm slightly. He's selfish, too. He wants to keep her for himself. Doesn't want to share her with Luca or anyone else. Wants her to be his and his alone. Especially when she speaks and her words reach him, making him flush that much deeper.]
T-That was all to trick you, you know... [It's muttered off to one side, but the rest of what she says strikes a chord within him, and he brushes their noses together.] I do... I do understand. More than you realize, I think. We're not so different, you and I...
WE CAN TRADE U GET BASKETBALL
[ to trick her? to do what? to drink his blood? she doesn't get it. she would've done that anyway.
and does it matter? she's happy and she hopes that vanitas is, too. she's so happy to be in love. to have these beautiful, warm feelings for another person. that simply rubbing their noses together puts her on cloud nine. back into babel.
a small, gentle smile tugs at her lips and she exhales a slow breath but it slowly fades as his words sink in. vanitas would want to die too if he ever became less of himself. ]
Is it... what you hide beneath your glove? You didn't want me to take it off.
YAAAAY SPORTS :V
But... in the end it worked out. They grew closer, and he started falling for her for real, too. Now they're both hopeless idiots in love. He doesn't know how to handle it, honestly - he's doing a pretty miserable job in his own eyes - but... he doesn't hate it anymore. It's... nice, actually, feeling loved and loving someone in return.
At her question, he looks away, suddenly becoming distant. He can't help clutching at his arm, flinching a bit as it seems to throb almost. But finally he nods slightly.]
...it'll take over me one day. I won't be myself anymore. I want someone to kill me before that happens.
SPORTSBAWL
and now? that's what he meant by understanding more than she realized. while he's looking away, clutching at his arm, spiralling into what his grim future holds, she wraps her arms tight around him. holding him like he did with her while she cried fearful and miserable tears on his chest.
she would offer to kill him but, unlike him, she's not sure if she could do it. she couldn't do it with chloé. instead, she makes a promise to herself.
for as long as he's alive, she'll love him with her whole being. she'll make sure that he'll never feel alone.
a darker thought passes through her mind, too. she hopes he kills her before she has to watch vanitas die. ]
Who do you think will do it...?
BETTER THAN A SPORTBRA??
He jolts at the feel of her arms around him, almost wanting to fight her off, but then the warmth of her her embrace comes through, and he realizes just how good it feels to be held in such a way again. Like he hasn't since he killed Luna. It leaves him trembling both from nerves and enjoyment.
He doesn't expect her to fulfill that request for him, doesn't want to place that burden on her. Not when she's already had to carry the weight of so many lives with her.
He would just be happy to see her smiling face before he dies, honestly. That would help bring him some measure of peace.]
...probably Noé, if I'm lucky.
NO THOSE ARE USEFUL
[ jeanne mutters his name into his shoulder and closes her eyes. it would be hard but, yes, she could entrust that heavy burden with him. just as she confided vanitas' safety while she saved lady dominique.
what worries her is if noé has killed anybody at all. he would be weighted with the guilt of killing someone he treausured. like she did for chloé for so long.
if she's unfortunate enough (and she just might be) to be around when vanitas dies, then... she holds him to her closer, burying how close she is to tears into his neck. ]
I'll make sure it's him, Vanitas.
TRU DAT
[It's a concern they both have, not only for Noé, but for Vanitas himself. If Noé can't manage it, then it might fall to Jeanne, and she may be unable to bring herself to do the job of ending his life. What then? Will he become a mindless monster? Or a malnomen himself like Queen Faustina?
It's a fate he doesn't want to think about, becoming something that would hurt others to such a degree. He has to believe that between his two dear friends, they could get the job done.
He sighs in relief at her words, hugging her back and nuzzling against the crook of her neck.]
...thank you.
honestly should've saved this convo for game but HHH THEy
just as he wouldn't allow it of her.
it's his gratitude that makes the tears spill over and her bottom lip to quiver. for her to hold him to near painful levels, sorry. squeeeeeeeze.
she lets go soon enough, reaching up to wipe at her face. what depressing talk when they were on the course to have sex. ]
... Huh? Where is Noé? [ ... ] I-I-I didn't even check to make sure he wasn't in the room before I - I - ! AUGH.